You know the old saying, "it takes a village"? Well, I want my village and I want it now! Why on earth did we think it was such a good idea to get away from everyone; our family and friends and isolate ourselves so that the brunt of all every day tasks, including raising our children was solely on one person; us? I don't know about you, but my husband works late evenings and every weekend; which gives me the lion's share of responsibility of childcare day after day after day. Please don't get me wrong; I love my children more than life, but some thing's gotta give.
Two hundred; even one hundred years ago, it was normal for families to have a cook, a maid, a nanny, a yard boy, a stable lad, etc. You get the idea;
many hands make light work. But now, that kind of help is only available to the uber-rich unless you live in a commune, or you have sister-wives. I'm not saying that I don't want to be involved in my children's lives every day; I do, very much. But I'd also like to have time for a shower each day for myself; for the last two and a half years, I'm lucky to have a shower every three days. I'd also like time to go to the gym and work off this baby weight (and then some) and maybe occasionally meet a girlfriend for lunch sans kids and have an enjoyable, adult conversation for an hour.
Prior to having our children, my husband and I enjoyed doing things together and apart. We are both independent souls and enjoy our freedom, and had an even balance of being away from each other and then coming together again each day. We enjoyed sharing our lives with each other without the need to be joined at the hip. But in my time of being a stay at home mom (SAHM) it feels like I'm stuck on "lather, rinse, repeat" or Groundhog Day, as I've described to my husband before. Every day is pretty much the same, with little or no adult contact for myself (unless you count The View and Oprah). My mom uniform is yoga capri pants w/tee shirt and flip flops. It makes no sense to wear anything nice since I just get spit up on several times a day, sneezed on and various other bodily fluid wiped on me. My clothes are just extensions of dish towels and kleenex. Being a SAHM is a full time job and then some all by itself, but then add to that general housework, laundry, bill paying, meals/dinner, grocery shopping, doctor appointments, etc, it's a wonder I ever have time to keep in touch w/friends via text or email, much less a phone call! (If you are talking to me on the phone, you should feel VERY special) [And if I'm out with you in person without my kids; then that is due to an act of congress and you should never doubt my love for you]
I guess I am just lacking a balance that I used to have and wishing there were other options our ancestors had. I also feel that I cannot possibly be the only one feeling this way either, right? So if you can in anyway relate to this at all, please leave a comment. I'd love to hear from you, even if it's just one line. I know if you are a mom like me, time is in short supply and you are probably wondering where your village is too.
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